Well, I had my last full time shift in the ER last night. Tomorrow I am starting a new job in the Medical Oncology Unit at Central Utah Clinic. It is with mixed feelings that I leave the ER; while I am excited to have a job with normal hours (no more nights, weekends, and holidays for me) I am going to miss my awesome co-workers and all the crazy, exciting, and unpredictable nights that I have spent in the ER. I am a little bit afraid that my life will seem dull and all too normal in the coming months; after all, there is a reason that so many TV shows (although dramatized) originate in the ER.
We all look happy enough (see above) (and we all love the night shift) but this (see right) is how I actually feel at 3:00 A.M. when I realize I still have 2 more hours left in my shift. It makes me smile as I think of Bret, one of our nurses who swears that he could be sound asleep one minute and doing CPR the next without missing a beat.
Last but not least I have to include a list. Anyone who has been a nurse for any length of time will appreciate this list (and it makes me chuckle as it reminds me of my last 2 years of dedicated service :)
You know you are a nurse if...
1. You would like to meet the inventor of the call light some night in
a Dark alley.
2. You have ever had a patient look you straight in the eye and say "I have no idea how that got stuck in there".
3. Your sense of humor gets more warped each year. Almost EVERYTHING
can seem humorous eventually!
4. You are able to identify different diarrhea by the smell.
5. You check the caller ID on your day off to see if anyone from the
hospital is trying to call and ask you to work.
6. You've been telling stories at a restaurant and someone at the next
table throws up.
7. You notice that you are using more four letter words than you did
before you started nursing.
8. You believe that all bleeding stops ... eventually.
9. You believe that "shallow gene pool" should be a recognized diagnosis.
10. You've told a confused patient that your name was that of your
co-worker and to holler if they need help.
11. Your bladder can expand to the size of a Winnebago's water tank.
12. You say to yourself "great veins" when looking at complete strangers at the grocery store.
13. Your idea of gambling is a blood alcohol pool instead of a football pool.
14. Your finger has gone places you never thought possible.
15. Your idea of a good time is a cardiac arrest at shift change.
16. You disbelieve 90% of what you are told and 75% of what you see.
18. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall anyone who utters the phrase "Wow, it's really quiet, isn't it?".
19. Your most common assessment question is "what changed tonight to make it an emergency after 6 hours/days/weeks/months/years?".
20. Your immune system is so well developed that is has been known to attack squirrels in the backyard.
21. You find humor in other people's stupidity.
1. You would like to meet the inventor of the call light some night in
a Dark alley.
2. You have ever had a patient look you straight in the eye and say "I have no idea how that got stuck in there".
3. Your sense of humor gets more warped each year. Almost EVERYTHING
can seem humorous eventually!
4. You are able to identify different diarrhea by the smell.
5. You check the caller ID on your day off to see if anyone from the
hospital is trying to call and ask you to work.
6. You've been telling stories at a restaurant and someone at the next
table throws up.
7. You notice that you are using more four letter words than you did
before you started nursing.
8. You believe that all bleeding stops ... eventually.
9. You believe that "shallow gene pool" should be a recognized diagnosis.
10. You've told a confused patient that your name was that of your
co-worker and to holler if they need help.
11. Your bladder can expand to the size of a Winnebago's water tank.
12. You say to yourself "great veins" when looking at complete strangers at the grocery store.
13. Your idea of gambling is a blood alcohol pool instead of a football pool.
14. Your finger has gone places you never thought possible.
15. Your idea of a good time is a cardiac arrest at shift change.
16. You disbelieve 90% of what you are told and 75% of what you see.
18. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall anyone who utters the phrase "Wow, it's really quiet, isn't it?".
19. Your most common assessment question is "what changed tonight to make it an emergency after 6 hours/days/weeks/months/years?".
20. Your immune system is so well developed that is has been known to attack squirrels in the backyard.
21. You find humor in other people's stupidity.
